Coelacanth Breeder’s Quarterly

…now with full color photos!


The Doclopedia #80

Average Joes: Joe Orion, Starship Mechanic


Oh now, jeez, I haven’t seen one of dese in years. An old Asimov 250 wit’ jump drive, right? Gosh, this is a classic, don’t ya know? There’s a fella back home in Fargo has got one o’ dese. ‘Course, he tricked his out wit’ da fancy nanopaint and some o’ dem fake Heinlein guns, but boy, he sure looks good in da annual Cruise Night parade.

Can I fix it? Oh yeah, you betcha! Might take a few days to get the parts, but I can have her up and runnin’ soon as I get ’em. I know a guy over on Seledara 4 who has a parts yard an’ he’ll get ’em here in a couple of days, fer sure. Probably be costin’ ya seven or eight thousand credits, can’t be real sure yet. Sixty day guarantee on all parts an’ labor, unless you see hard combat.

If yer lookin’ fer a place ta stay, dey got nice rooms over dere at da Olympus Mons Hilton. Great buffet, too. Can’t beat our Martian cattle for a nice big steak or slice o’ prime rib. Dey got maybe 200 kindsa beer, too.

We got a buncha folks from Titan in town dis week and things have been gettin’ a bit excitin’, don’t ya know. Dem outlanders get in-system, dey just start raisin’ hell.

Say now, is that a Ellison Industries particle cannon ya got there? Ya know, for an extra 500 credits, I can install the full auto upgrade for ya…