Atomic Pants

…really!

 

The Doclopedia #82

Average Joes: Joe Konk, Security Guard

 

Uhh, yeah, I’m the only security guard here at the ACME factory. It’s rough work, but what else am I gonna do? I’m not good lookin’ like Mickey Mouse or smart like Bugs Bunny.

Besides, I recover pretty quickly from all of the assaults by thieving toons. Why, I’ve been konked with baseball bats, hit in the face with frying pans, had pianos dropped on my head, run through a pasta machine, shot by 27 kinds of gun, blown up, made to watch daytime television, eaten by a tiger, covered with cement, squished into a number 303 can, pounded into the ground by a huge mallet, chomped by a crocodile, inflated like a balloon, steamrollered flat, stomped on by elephants and painted pink. And that was just this week!