Radar Death Kitties From Jupiter

… a 12 part RKO serial

The Doclopedia #143

The Alphabet: B

B is for BULGARK THE INSANE

Bulgark (who was only called “The Insane” by people who lived very far away from his kingdom) was the son of Ragtarl The Slayer and was, from 1196 CE to 1227 CE, the Supreme Ruler of the Screaming Face Ogres. He was very large and very strong and yes, very insane. Every other ogre of the Screaming Face nation hated and feared him. This was pretty understandable, since Bulgark would often go into fits of paranoid rage and kill 20 or 30 ogres before he finally fell asleep.

Mind you, on the battlefield he was much beloved, since he could mow down humans, elves or dwarves like some crazed threshing machine. Of course, sometimes he’d keep on killing once all the enemy was dead, but that was why his fellow ogres used to keep lots of orcs between them and Bulgark.

Bulgark had several wives and many children over the years of his reign and a few of them actually survived. When he died in 1227, his last wife and 3 of his children gleefully chopped his body up and fed it to a pen full of wild snorfiggers. Nobody cared because they were too busy celebrating.

Upon his death, Bulgark’s eldest son, Korfmog, assumed the throne. He was pretty sane for an ogre and ruled for 48 years,

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