A Duck Named Chuck And A Buck Named Huck Had Good Luck Driving A Truck Through Muck And Yuck With Their Chicken, Cluckcluck

…they never got stuck

The Doclopedia #336

Unexpected Places: Around The Curve In The Road And Over The Bridge…

…lies the hut of old Gorganius, the seer. You’ll find him to be friendly and talkative, although I will warn you that he only bathes on the night of the first full moon, so you’ll want to stand upwind of him. Oh, don’t mind his dog, Komo. Old fellow barks his head off, but barely has any teeth left and is just too lazy to bite anyone.

Now, as to getting Gorganius to look into your future, well, first you must pay the price he asks. No, it’s never in coin, my friend, but it’s also never more than you can afford to pay for a glimpse into what lies ahead.

I know for a fact that King Urodain of Carmanthia had to journey halfway around the world to fetch three red stones from a distant desert and the High Priest of Bool needed to find a bone from his god before Gorganius would serve them. It is rumored that, as a young man, our own beloved Emperor Adrakas was tasked with retrieving a bottle of freshly killed Sea Titan’s blood. Whatever he learned of his fate, it must have served him in good stead, since he is this year entering into an unprecedented 40th year as Emperor.

One more thing, friend…Gorganius enjoys a bit of wine while conversing. Fortunately for you, I have laid in a good supply of wine that I sell at very reasonable rates.

The Doclopedia #337

Unexpected Places: Just Over There, Behind That Tree…

…no, no…that big old willow…that’s where the entrance to Otherland is. Oh yeah, I know what they say about me in town, but I’ve seen the place! And if that George Silva wasn’t as worried about getting re-elected as mayor, he’d tell how he was there with me, instead of laughing and saying I must have been drunk!

Truth is, both me and George had a drink or two that day, but only after we had stumbled around in that crazy place for several hours. Yeah, once we found our way out, George broke out his flask and we had a few pulls on it. Come to think of it, I think I had 2-3 drinks to his one. Ok, so that’s how the lying son of a bitch got back to town ahead of me and then set up his own story about me wandering off while we was hunting. God damn it!

What’s it like over there? Well, at first, it don’t seem much different than here. Same sorts of trees, hills and dales, creeks and ponds…but then you start seeing strange animals like the Six Legged Skunk and those Flying Turtles. After a bit, the Pixies and Brownies and such start following you or stopping you for a chat. Then you see the trees up and start walking around and you really want to get the hell outta there, which ain’t nearly as easy as getting in.

Yeah, you can see the willow and stuff on this side from over there. It’s kind of a squarish window or doorway, maybe 8 foot square. No, there didn’t seem to be any willows in Otherland, come to think of it. What’s that your friend is doing? A locater beacon? Say, that there’s a damned good idea! And glow in the dark yellow paint on the willow trunk? Yessir, I’d say that will make it easier to find.

Go with you? Hell no! But I’ll tell you what, I’ll sit here with your other two friends and their computers. If you guys get proof that Otherland exists, I want to be able to go into town and call George a damned dirty liar to his face!

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