The Ladies Journal Of Advanced Thaumaturgy

…now incorporating the Vaginamancy Newsletter

The Doclopedia #618

The Dungeon Of…: Screaming Madness

The Dungeon of Screaming Madness is in many respects no different from any average run of the mill 5 level dungeon. It has many of the same rooms, monsters, traps & treasures you might find in a hundred other dungeons. It is located not too far from civilization and, in all respects, seems to be a pretty sweet deal for any halfway competent band of dungeon raiders.

Unfortunately, the dungeon also fully lives up to its name. The whole damned place has been enchanted to slowly drive any sentient being mad. The first level merely imparts a mild “creepy” feeling and the second level adds a bit of paranoia. By the time the third level is reached, only the most sound of mind will not be acting a bit twitchy.

The third level ramps everything up and throws in mild sensory hallucinations. One person might smell rotting flesh, while another might hear something following the group. Sometimes, a visual hallucination will hit the entire party. Nightmares become common.

By the fourth level, most people will be at least partially unhinged and this level cranks it all up to 11. About halfway through it, people either start running off madly or killing each other.

If anybody makes it to the fifth level, there are great riches to be had if you are not a barking mad lunatic. Odds are, you will be. Still, an amazing number of people make it out of the dungeon. Sadly, their sanity does not go with them.

Recently, it was discovered quite by accident that if crazy people go into the dungeon, they emerge sane. Even now, the king is looking to assemble a band of lunatics to go into the place and return with a heap of treasure.

.

.

.

The Doclopedia #619

The Dungeon Of…: Lork, The Trickster

The Wizard Lork Gortain spent the last century of his life constructing a large two level dungeon beneath the Shining Hill in northwest Yuveristan. The second level of it has several rooms chock full of wonderful treasures. It is a much sought after place by adventurers. The thing is, Lork’s nickname was “The Trickster” and it was well deserved. It has been said that if you can walk ten feet without encountering a trick or a trap, you are in the wrong dungeon.

To add insult to injury, the traps are not even particularly deadly. What they are is embarrassing, demoralizing, transforming and just plain infuriating. You will find few adventurers who have been there that do not curse a blue streak at the mention of Lork’s name.

A few of the tricks & traps which, by the way, change every time a new group enters the dungeon, are…

A door that sprays a large area with liquified dragon feces

A 20 foot deep pit trap that, once you have fallen into the muck at the bottom spits you back out. Hard.

The bag of jewels that, 30 minutes after you pick it up, transforms into a very angry wolverine.

The much reviled fountain of Uglification that looks and acts (at first) like a Fountain of Healing.

A small wandering monster that follows the party for hours singing “The Happy Farmer” over and over again. It cannot be killed.

The dreaded Room of Insatiable Lust. Many an adventurer has shagged his party members, monsters and assorted furniture here.

The Hall of Rank Farts

The gold pieces that turn into copper pieces once you are outside the dungeon.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s