Pee Wee Santos And The Death Ride Of Terror

…for years after that, Pee Wee had a nervous tic


The Doclopedia #805

My Evil Twin: Zimondo (Simon Rogers)

No doubt about it, Simon Rogers was a darned good looking man. With his devilish good looks and impeccable fashion sense, Simon was admired by men and lusted after by women. He looked so good that James Bond asked him for grooming suggestions.

All of which is why his Evil Twin, Zimondo, hated him and wanted him dead. You see, Zimondo had terrible fashion sense and was known to slack off on his personal grooming. It didn’t help that he was colorblind and had a very poor sense of smell, either. His years of hard living hadn’t improved his face, either.

So yeah, he was pretty damned jealous of Simon and set up a death trap for him. Actually, he set up 26 different death traps over a 5 year period and not one of them so much as mussed a hair on Simon’s perfectly coiffed head. They did, on the other hand, mess up Zimondo pretty thoroughly. Over the years, he was…


Set on fire


Run over by trucks

Blown up


Bitten by sharks

Thrown 900 feet by a catapult

Dropped off a cliff. Twice.

Sunk into quicksand


Mauled by lions & tigers & bears. Oh my

Now, Zimondo still hates Simon, but finds it much safer to just send him rude emails.