This Week’s Episode: Willie Borrows Clem’s Mule

…it’s a laugh riot

The Doclopedia #912

The Alphabet: B

B is for…Baker Elves

These jolly little elves stand just four inches tall and travel in family groups of 5 to 15. Most baker elves have blond hair, but redheads are not unknown. They all tend to be a bit on the chubby side, but are quick and nimble nonetheless.

As their name implies, these tiny folk just love to bake things. A family group will set up shop in a human home, then every night for a week or so, they’ll bake things late at night for their hosts to eat. By using a magical spell, the Baker Elves insure that the humans won’t wake up until the baked goodies are out of the oven in the morning. After a week or so, they tiny bakers move on to another human dwelling.

Everybody loves Baker Elves. Even cats & dogs won’t bother them.

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The Doclopedia #913

The Alphabet: C

C Is For…Cold Pigs

On Earth 72, there is a large and very dangerous species of swine that lives in the cold sub-polar regions. Standing 4 feet tall at the shoulders and nine feet long from snout to tail, these hogs are covered in dense thick fur over an even thicker coat of fat. They travel in small herds consisting of one or two boars, three to six sows and, in the spring & summer, up to two dozen piglets.

Cold Pigs will eat anything they find or can kill. In the summer, they roam the tundra eating plants, small animals, birds eggs and carrion. They will chase polar bears, foxes, snow yetis and wolves away from a kill, although they only chase away the wolves when they outnumber them. Cold Pigs will also kill and eat humans, elves and other humanoids if they get the chance. These giant swine are able to move with great stealth and even greater speed when necessary. Often, the first and last thing their prey sees are those razor sharp foot long tusks.

In the fall, Cold Pigs move to their winter hunting grounds in the upper range of the boreal forests. Here, they can survive the winter in relative comfort, providing they don’t encounter Northern Goblins, Forest Dragons or a very large pack of wolves.

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