It’s All Fun & Games Until You Cast The Wrong Spell

…and “Nuclear Flatulence” is ALWAYS the wrong spell!

 

The Doclopedia #932

The Alphabet: V

V is for…Violence Suppressor: From the New York Times, May 7th, 1886: Doctor Karellan has invented the Miracle of Our Age in his Violence Suppressor! His recent demonstrations in the Bronx and Manhattan have proven that his device is a godsend. When switched on, all violence within the area of effect, which our reporters determined was roughly three miles across, dropped within hours to nearly zero. Even the most deranged maniacs and hardened criminals became as docile as lambs. It is theorized that prolonged exposure to the vibrations produced by the device will even repair the minds of the insane.

This paper predicts that within the year, the good doctor will be installing these devices, which run on a slight amount of electricity, in cities across the nation and around the world. A new day has dawned and soon mankind will be free of the scourge of our violent urges!

From the New York Times, September 27th, 1898: Reports from the Army and Washington say that levels of violence and madness have dropped back down to pre-1886 levels in most areas of the nation. The number of dead and incarcerated will be tallied up soon, but is expected to number in the hundreds of thousands. Similar reports are coming in from around the world.

Shortly before his death from grievous wounds, Doctor Karellan stated that he had no idea or indication that heavy solar activity would shut down his Violence Suppressors, which had, up until two years ago, made this world such a better place.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s