...for his cornflakes The Doclopedia #1,168 Murder By...: Books “Yes, YES, I killed her! I admit it and I'm glad I did she's dead! It was always “I'm reading blah blah blah” or “So and so is doing a book signing” or “I've preordered such and such titles”. All she ever talked about were friggin' … Continue reading Milk For The Mongoose
...I forgot that it was in my pocketThe Doclopedia #1,165Fish Of the Day: Walking LungsharkSomewhere on Earth 88 there might be a more terrifying fish than the Walking Lungshark, but we are damned if we know what it might be.Combining aspects of the lungfish, walking catfish and great white shark, these 20 foot long eating … Continue reading Garlic In The Laundry
...and they are NOT nice bunnies The Doclopedia #1,163 Fish Of the Day: Yelling Carp This fish is a large blue-gray carp that periodically comes to the surface to yell things in a surprisingly human voice. This always scares the hell out of most humans and animals nearby. During the Yelling Carp mating season, … Continue reading No Escape From Bunnyland
...all the news that fits in a newsletterThe Doclopedia #1,161A Hand Full Of...: Gold“Holy shit, Jimmy, that's gold! A real gold bar! It must have been left behind when the old mine closed down in 1884. Holy shit!Let me hold it. Man, it's heavy, isn't it? How much do you think it's worth? NO WAY! … Continue reading The Professional Newsletter Writer’s Newsletter
...welcome back, big guy. we missed you. The Doclopedia #1,159 A Hand Full Of...: Dwiff “Oh yes, your Most High Skondorf, that is indeed dwiff, straight from the Cliffs of Ooon. The Thrice Blessed Kelldorn, Feemis Feev, went out and personally slew many lowgs and roozards to get to the Cliffs and obtain it … Continue reading Are You Ready To Enter The Kingdom Of Godzilla?
...as told by Sasha Jane Cross The Doclopedia #1,158 A Hand Full Of...: Goop “That there in yer hand is 100% Goop, young fella. Comes outta them Goop Cactus over yonder and it's worth twice as much as gold. Why? Well, ya see, if ya mix a bit in some booze, it makes a drink … Continue reading Amazing Adventures In Mad Science!
...it was warm and buttery The Doclopedia #1,156Dolls: DollgoraWhat turned a typical child's doll into a 300 foot tall city destroying kaiju with laser eyes and acid fog breath? Nobody in Japan has a clue, but when she burst up from below the city, you can bet they tried to find out.Unfortunately, Dollgora didn't make researching … Continue reading The Warm Noodle Event
...from the July, 1956 issue The Doclopedia #1,155Dolls: Miracle BabyOn an Earth where several factors came together to drastically lower the birth rate anywhere from 60% to 90%, The desire to have babies drove people to do extreme and often tragic things. Eventually, the World Council made all crimes related to baby acquisition (aside from legal … Continue reading Doc Tempest VS The Deadly Dogs
...now leave me alone. The Doclopedia #1,153Dolls: Asskicker BarbeeOn Earth 15, where girls are raised to be just as tough as boys, the number one selling doll is Asskicker Barbee (followed closely by Crimefighter Barbee and GI Barbee). The doll comes dressed in regular street clothes and armed with a knife, a baseball bat and a … Continue reading OK, I Admit It! I Wrote The Book Of Love!
...of steam age robotics The Doclopedia #1,152Fun Facts About Our Galaxy: The Donut PlanetShaped like a donut, hole in the center and all, the Donut Planet is one of the 15 “Mad Planets” created 750 million years ago by the race known only as “The Bwimuush”.The planet is located 30 light years from the nearest naturally … Continue reading Doctor Silkmelon Arranges An Exhibition
...I think they were hiding The Doclopedia #1,149Fun Facts About Our Galaxy: The Clown PlanetDid you ever see that movie with the killer clowns from space? Well, this planet is like that, only worse. Thankfully, the homicidal blood & flesh consuming clowns that live here do not have space travel capabilities.Nobody knows how this planet came … Continue reading Quails In The Flower Patch
...one of the lesser known works. The Doclopedia #1,148Magical Masks: The Last Mask You Will Ever WearYes, students, we will indeed be ending this series of lectures with the legendary Death Mask, the last mask you will ever wear. Oh my, I do believe that we have broken the record for faintings. Do count them up, … Continue reading The Tibetan Book Of The Dad
...or did the pig get him? hmmm... The Doclopedia #1,147Magical Masks: The UnMaskStudents, this mask, a very plain affair made of cotton cloth, should only be donned by the bravest of the brave. You see, once this mask is on a face, it shows the wearer as he or she truly is in their heart of … Continue reading Junior Muskrat Gets A Pig