Chapter 146: In Which Our Hero Saves A Fair Maiden From The French, Then Tosses The Evil Cardinal Off A Cliff

…sadly, God was not on the cardinal’s side

 

The Doclopedia #1,179

The Truth About Monsters: Owlbears

Few monsters are as strange looking and as misunderstood as the Owlbear. It’s half a ton of grizzly bear with the head of an enormous owl, walks upright and, when it can find a mate, reproduces by laying eggs.

The first half dozen Owlbears, three of each sex, were created by the well known and totally insane wizard Igor Vanaskofsky. Old Igor was infamous for his creation of strange and dangerous creatures such as Butterfly Cobras, Tigoose (tiger/moose), Octoapes and Owlbears. Fortunately for the world, Igor was killed and eaten by his final creation, a cross between a shrew and an crocodile.

Owlbears can be very dangerous during mating season or when raising young, but most of the time, they are solitary creatures that prefer a very large home territory. They eat almost anything they can catch and sleep in caves or lairs they dig themselves.

What most people don’t know about Owlbears is that they are quite a bit more intelligent than either bears or owls. Studies of them reveal that they are just shy of being sentient, which is beginning to come into conflict with their solitary nature. They want to interact with other Owlbears and certain other species, but their instinct keeps them from it most of the time.

A few Owlbears have started staying together as couples for at least long enough to raise young. A very few have formed bonded pairs. Not surprisingly, these bonded pairs have a much higher survival rate than loners do. It is also more likely that their offspring will form bonded pairs when they mate.

Finally, a few Owlbears have been observed using tools. Now, by tools, we mean things like a stick to knock a prey animal out of a tree or a rock to drop on an unsuspecting future meal, but that is still definite tool use.

In conclusion, it is obvious that Owlbears are no longer the dumb creatures we once thought they were and are in fact rapidly heading toward becoming yet another sentient species.

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