The Mostly Pretty Innocent, But Sometimes A Bit “Spanky”, Story Of Mostly Purple Patty And The Jar Of Squid Paste.

…co-starring her horse, Reginald



The Doclopedia #1,326

Spells Gone Wild: Fear

Yes, General Halkorian, I was there at the Battle of Bluestone Creek. I was…am…a Wizard of the second circle. I was assigned to work with Wizard Orlyanda, who is…was…actually, we aren’t sure what happened to her…anyway, she was of the ninth circle. She was exceptionally powerful, even for a niner. Oh, yes, sir. It’s a slang term Wizards use. Niner, sevener, fiver, etc.

So as I was saying, she was very powerful and had very wide range of spells to choose from. Why, she was even the creator of several well known spells. She was First Wizard that day, at the battle.

Yes, sir, we were on the hill that runs along the south side of Bluestone Creek. It’s not very tall, but it still gave us a great view of the meadow to the north where the battle was going to take place.

As you know the Iron Fist, as King Vulmar’s army is…err, was…known, was lead by the mysterious mercenary warrior known as Kronius. He wore red armor and a full face mask. Nobody knew what he really looked like. He was terrifying in battle and it was said he could not be killed.

So, as the Iron Fist advanced, ten thousand strong and with Kronius in the lead, our own brave forces, though outnumbered two to one, were ready to repel them. Up atop the hill, Wizard Orlyanda was linking up to two eighters, three seveners and a half dozen fivers, fours and threes.

What, sir? Oh, yes. Linking is when a powerful Wizard binds themselves to Wizards of lower power in order to cast a powerful spell over a wide area. Orlyanda meant to cast the Fear spell over several hundred of the Iron Fist’s front ranks. It would have been very effective, I am sure. But then Kronius saw her.

He stopped the march forward and looked up toward us. He then called out “Orly? Is that you up there?”. Orlyanda stiffened and looked quite surprised for a few seconds. Then Kronius took off his mask and, well, I have never seen a woman become so angry.

Kronius looked like a fairly handsome man. He laughed at Orlyanda’s reaction to him and said something about her hair and then she screamed and cast a spell so powerful that you could SEE the shockwave sweeping out from her. Her extreme emotion, coupled with the fact that she was linked to the other Wizards, expanded the spell’s range and intensity until it engulfed the entire ten thousand warriors of the Iron Fist. We could hear them begin screaming in terror.

But rather that a quick flash/bang, as is normal, the spell kept pouring out of her, as if it were flame from a dragon. Out on the field, men were rendered insane and even killed outright by the intense fear. It was horrible, sir.

At some point, Orlyanda and Kronius became joined via a beam of arcane energy. She screamed, he screamed and then there was an explosion of light. That would be when I collapsed.

When I came to, a good hour had passed. The Iron Fist was either dead, catatonic or running full speed away to the north. Our own forces, who had caught just a bit of the blast, were quaking with fear. Up where I was, the two eighters were dead, the seveners were in very bad shape and all the rest of us were in varying degrees of pain. Wizard Orlyanda was nowhere to be found.

Oh, yes, sir, it was a definite win for our side. Thank you sir. Yes, sir, I will get in touch with the College of Wizards tomorrow. Yes, sir, I hope they can find Orlyanda, too.”