Not In This Issue: Raspberries, Albino Bats or Coffee Cake Recipes

…but there might be a tart recipe.

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The Doclopedia #1,331

News Of The Multiverse: Weather

Alice Springs, Australia, Earth 16-C: Nuclear tornadoes are expected to hit this town early on Thursday morning. While smaller and less intense that in previous years, it is expected that there might be as many as 16 of them. Few, if any are expected to go above F-2. Residents are advised to stay in the Deep Shelter until the storms are past and de-radiation has been done.

Blois, France, Earth 214-A: The Centre region of France will be experiencing blistering heat, snowstorms, driving rain and dense fog for the next week. This comes after an official in the regional government insulted the supervillain known as Le Maître de la Météo (The Weather Master) on television over the weekend. Appeals to the weather controlling villain fell upon deaf ears as he told the press that he would not be insulted by any pig of a politician. A large portion of the region’s population has already begun leaving the area.

Wichita, Kansas, Earth 3-J: The forcast for this week is snow. Lots of snow. Just like last week, last month, last year and the last four goddamn decades. We are nearly half a century into a new ice age caused by 100 years of global climate change, folks. This isn’t going away anytime soon. Be glad we were able to move underground. Jesus, I hate my job. Fucking snow.

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