The TRUTH!

…which, of course, you can’t handle

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The Doclopedia #2,039

Strange Bandanas: The Orange Jose Cuervo One

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I own hundreds of bandanas. Many of them have strange stories connected to them. Here is one…

No, this bandana confers no tequila related powers to me, nor does it improve my ability to speak spanish. What it dies do is keep me warm in temperatures as low as 40 degrees, Farenheit. Pretty useful, I think you’ll agree, although the effect is only good for about an hour, then the bandana needs to recharge for about 4 hours.

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The Doclopedia #2,040

Strange Bandanas: The Solid Yellow One

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I own hundreds of bandanas. Many of them have strange stories connected to them. Here is one…

I got this bandana in 1981 from a street vendor in Vladivostok after I had helped her son hide from a KGB agent and a trained attack goat. (long story)

This bandana is friendly enough, but only speaks Russian. I have taught it a few words in English, but it’s accent is very thick. It is not a big fan of me wearing it, but will tolerate things for a few hours. It has no really special powers, but it can sing Russian folk songs in a fine baritone. It enjoys a shot of vodka now and again, too.

My Dragon Romance

…it was hot

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The Doclopedia #2,037
Strange Bandanas: The Dark Brown One

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I own hundreds of bandanas. Many of them have strange stories connected to them. Here is one

I bought this bandana at a thrift store in Walla Walla, Washington, in 2009. It cost me 75 cents. I soon found out that if I wore it, I would smell like chocolate to any woman who was out of puberty. They seemed to find it arousing.

Being a happily married and faithful man, I put the bandana away and now only wear it around my wife.

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The Doclopedia #2,038

Strange Bandanas: The Green Skulls One

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I own hundreds of bandanas. Many of them have strange stories connected to them. Here is one…

This black bandana has neon green skulls on it. They look like they should glow in the dark, but they don’t. I got it in the mail back in 1990. There was no return address.

Around 1993, I happened to be wearing it as I walked past a remote 200 year old cemetary in rural New Jersey. (long story) It was just after midnight and as I walked along, ghosts began talking to me. Pretty soon, I had about 50 of them crowded around me asking me all sorts of questions.

You might think chatting with the dead would be frightening or maybe interesting, but actually, it was pretty boring. Mostly, they wanted to know about the folks they had left behind. Of course, I could not answer their questions, since I was not around 150 years ago to know who they were talking about. Most of them sadly drifted back to their graves, although one old woman did ask me to kick her husband in the balls if I ever met his ghost.

The Beginners Guide To Freestyle Flooning

…fully illustrated

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The Doclopedia #2,035

Strange Bandanas: The Orange & Pink One

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I own hundreds of bandanas. Many of them have strange stories connected to them. Here is one…

My orange and pink tie dyed bandana is as sweet tempered and lovable as any bandana you will ever meet. It is stylish, yet simple, and it would never cause harm.

Unless you try to serve me liver in any form. At that point, it will go on the attack, knocking the food to the floor and then attempting to strangle the person who served it to me. Fortunately, I have always been able to wrest it from their throat and then calm it down.

Rather embarrassing, yes, but then again, they tried to serve me liver.

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The Doclopedia #2,036

Strange Bandanas: The Green Tiger Striped One

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I own hundreds of bandanas. Many of them have strange stories connected to them. Here is one…

I got this bandana from a Hindu mystic in India. He told me it would summon the Green Tiger, a legendary mix of animal and plant, that possesses a wide range of powerful magic spells and is consumed with bloodlust.

To be honest, I’ve never summoned the Green Tiger because I’m afraid it might turn on me. It’s a very cool looking bandana, though.

Questions About Zebras

…we get a lot of them from lions

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The Doclopedia #2,033

Well, That’s Different: Pro Roleplaying

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On Earth 2-O, tabletop roleplaying games, besides being immensly popular, are also a professional sport. It started when a television news crew did a story on a D&D tournament at a con and began to really catch on a couple of years later. By 1989, professional RPG matches were being televised once a week on a national network on Saturday evenings.

Televised sessions run 3 hours, but live session can run up to 6 hours. The game rules, regardless of genre or brand, are always streamlined and play is both against the clock and the scenario. Both players and Gms are rated by an international organization. Winning players get to split a prize ranging from a few thousand dollars to well over a million. Gms who participate get a set amount, but there are also GM only games, where all the players are well known GMs. There are also arena battles and free for all everyone for themselves dungeon runs.

While the fantasy genre is by far the most popular, the science fiction and horror genres are also big draws.

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The Doclopedia #2,034

Well, That’s Different: Modular Computers

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On Earth 1-V, one of the big differences from us is that personal computers are sold in modular pieces that plug together easily and quickly. Each module is housed in it’s own case, which can come in a wide variety of shapes, sizes, patterns and colors. You will almost never see two personal computers that look exactly alike.

This Posting Is Very Late

…but not too late
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The Doclopedia #2,031

Well, That’s Different: National Park States
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On Earth 4-V in the current year of 2000, there are 123 states in the United States of America. That includes the 50 states we know, plus Puerto Rico, Guam, Baja California and 70 National Parks that are separate states within other states, sometimes sevearl in a single state, such as California with 6. These park states are home to and overseen by various Native American Nations. While independent, with their own Senators, Congressfolk and laws, they are also strongly aligned with the primary state they are found in. This is because they cannot have any industries that disturb the natural state of the park.

Thus, most of the “park states” rely on the mother state for anything they cannot produce. The mother state, in return, gains a portion of the money generated by tourism and certain other park businesses. This can be a considerable amount, with California again leading the pack..

The park states are sometimes considerably larger than the parks in our world. For example, Everglades National Park State was formed in 1872, before massive drainage projects could start. Because of this, the Everglades remain in near pristine condition and the park state covers the entire southern third of Florida, from just north of Lake Okeechobee south, including the Keys. The Seminole Nation is thriving.
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The Doclopedia #2,032

Well, That’s Different: MoonBots

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On Earth 2-L the US space program stalled in 1974 with the failed attempt by the Apollo 19 astronauts to set up a small permanent moon base. A rushed attempt by NASA to prevent the Nixon administration from shutting the whole program down, everything from materials failure to human error caused it to fail. Nixon shut down the manned space program in April, then in August, committed suicide by poison in the Rose Garden.

The Apollo 19 failure had stopped the exploration of the moon by humans cold, but it lit a fire under several high school students across North America. A few months later, several of them met at the National Science Fair. They stayed up late discussing everything from Star Trek (then nearing it’s final season) to science in general to how they would have built a base on the moon. That spawned hundreds of letters and the recruitment of other young science fans when most of them went to the International Science Fair in Paris during their senior year.

Eight years later, in 1984, several of these scientists got together to form a company called MoonBots Inc. Using advances in robotics, computers and materials, they constructed three robots and a 90,000 square foot chamber that perfectly duplicated conditions on the moon. They placed the robots and some prefabricted building materials inside the chamber and tnen invited 50 scientists, several senators and congressmen, all the major media companies, NASA officials and President Carter to come see how a permanent moon base could be built.

Over the course of two days, working 24/7, the MoonBots built a base large enough to comfotably hold 6 astronauts, several science experiment stations, two moon buggies and enough supplies of food, air, water and oxygen for a year. The robots also created a smooth and compacted landing space nearby.

Everyone who saw the demonstration was very impressed and the President told NASA to make a moon base their top priority. NASA did just that and the first moon base was ready for humans to outfit and move into 18 months later.

Now (current year: 2018) there are nearly 300 MoonBots and 10,000 people living on the moon. There are also 40 MarsBots and 200 people living on Mars. On Earth, a staggering 25,000 SmartBots are busy night and day repairing centuies of human caused damage to the planet.

The Place Where Puppies Are Demons And Children Drink Blood

…don’t ever go there

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The Doclopedia #2,029

Well, That’s Different: Tower Farms

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On Earth 1-K, farming and, to a somewhat lesser degree, ranching, underwent a massive revolution in 1974. That was the year Micheal DeBrea, Ethan Joong and Patty Rains patented their idea for a “tower farm”. Simply put, a tower farm is a multi-level, fully contained greenhouse. Water and air are recirculated from top to bottom with little loss of either on a daily basis. Since the climate is totally controllable, including light, the growing season is year round. There is no need for herbicides, fungicides, pesticides or chemical fertilizers. Everyone who enters goes through a three stage sterilization process. The only living creatures found inside a tower farm are brought in by the farmer. These usually include honeybees, earthworms, selected microorganisms in the soil and usually some form of poultry for the soil enriching manure.

The first tower farm was five stories high and covered 5 acres of land, totaling 25 acres of growing space. The farm raised tomatoes, peppers, squash and flowers. All year, in North Dakota. 10,000 farmers from all over the world toured it that first year. Within 2 years, there were 300 tower farms just like it in 11 countries. By 1984, that number had risen to 1,800 farms, some as tall as 10 stories with a 10 acre base.

Today (current year: 2034, almost no farming is done outside tower farms and things are being grown where they could not be grown before, such as avocados in the middle of Australia. Additionally, many tower farms are used to raise free range poultry of all sorts and some are used to raise pasture feed pigs, goats, sheep and even cattle.

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The Doclopedia #2,030

Well, That’s Different: Airships

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On Earth 3-G, fossil fuels started getting very hard to find around 1930. The price of gasoline, diesel and other fuels shot through the roof. The infant airline industry was pretty much stopped dead…except for airships. Zeppelins were still much cheaper to run, so they pretty much replaced airplanes.

Over the next couple of decades, without a World War II to interrupt things (No fuel, no war) airships underwent vast improvements and design changes. Some of the new technology, like better electric batteries for power, came from the automobile industry. Some designs took their cues from cruise ships and first class train travel. By the mid 1950s, travel by airship was safe, affordable and comfortable. Today (current year: 1990), airships are used for travel, transporting goods and scientific research.

Loki Is My Co-Pilot

…and he’s very funny

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The Doclopedia #2,027
Tiny Folk Villages: Needle

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In the Dolomite Mountains of Italy, there is one small outcropping known as “The Needle”. It does look like a needle from a distance, standing about 200 feet tall with a pronounced point. The spire is about 25 feet across for most of it’s height.

The Needle is home to around 500 Tiny Folk who live inside it in large and comfortable homes. In fact, there are more homes that needed, because The Needle is a vacation getaway for Italian, Austrian and Swiss Tiny Folk looking for a relaxing stay in an interesting setting. Both the accomodations and food are top rated.

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The Doclopedia #2,028
Tiny Folk Villages: Village De Raisin
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Known as Grape Village in English, this small Tiny Folk village, home to a mere 200, is located on a vineyard in the Loire Valley region. It has been here since at least the 14th century.

Unlike some of the other villages we’ve covered, this one is very ordinary and really just one of about 100 in the area. Life here moves at a slow pace and, well, they’re French. The food and wine are very good, the local animals are almost all friendly and several of the vintners in the area know about the Tiny Folk.

Tiny Folk tourists and artists sometimes stop by for a day or two, but mostly, life just goes on as it has for hundreds of years.