There Were Tears On Her Cheeks, But A Smile In Her Eyes

…as he rode away on his big iron horse

Well…lessee now…I’m tired from a day of working in the garden…well fed by the cooking skills of My Sweet Angel, Grace…about half drunk (using the Cross Family definition of “about half drunk) on Sierra Nevada Brewing Company Stout…and I think it’s time to post the lyrics of a song about cannabalism.

Timothy by

Trapped in a mine that had caved in
And everyone knows the only ones left
Were Joe and me and Tim
When they broke through to pull us free
The only ones left to tell the tale
Were Joe and me

Timothy, Timothy, where on earth did you go?
Timothy, Timothy, God why don’t I know?

Hungry as hell no food to eat
And Joe said that he would sell his soul
For just a piece of meat
Water enough to drink for two
And Joe said to me, “I’ll have a swig
And then there’s some for you.”

Timothy, Timothy, Joe was looking at you
Timothy, Timothy, God what did we do?

I must have blacked out just around then
‘Cause the very next thing that I could see
Was the light of the day again
My stomach was full as it could be
And nobody ever got around
To finding Timothy

And now some song lyrics about masturbation…

She Bop by Cindy Lauper

We-hell-I see them every night in tight blue jeans–
In the pages of a blue boy magazine
Hey I’ve been thinking of a new sensation
I’m picking up–good vibration–
Oop–she bop–

Do I wanna go out with a lion’s roar
Huh, yea, I wanna go south n get me some more
Hey, they say that a stitch in time saves nine
They say I better stop–or I’ll go blind
Oop–she bop–she bop

She bop–he bop–a–we bop
I bop–you bop–a–they bop
Be bop–be bop–a–lu–she bop,
I hope He will understand
She bop–he bop–a–we bop
I bop–you bop–a–they bop
Be bop–be bop–a–lu–she bop,
Oo–oo–she–do–she bop–she bop

(whistle along here)…

Hey, hey–they say I better get a chaperone
Because I can’t stop messin’ with the danger zone
No, I won’t worry, and I won’t fret–
Ain’t no law against it yet–
Oop–she bop–she bop–

She bop–he bop–we bop…

And finally, todays character…

The Doclopedia

About this character:  This is the kind of characters you get when Your Humble Narrator is hammered:)

#46: Alphonse & Gaston

Main Trait (Alphonse): Huge Size/Endurance

Main Trait (Gaston): Danger Sense/Night Vision

On April 12th, 2009, an experiment at the top secret Area 54 research facility went horrible wrong. It left the minds of Dr. Chandra Bannerjee and Dr. Gregg Emerson trapped in the bodies of Alphonse (an Irish Wolfhound) and Gaston (a Maine Coon cat). Ever worse, it made them both the object of a government Locate and Destroy mission of the highest level.

So far, Alphonse & Gaston have eluded their pursuers, but how much longer that can go on is anybody’s guess. Since their human bodies were destroyed in the accident, they are probably stuck in their new host bodies unless they can figure a way out and into new human bodies. With this in mind, they are working their way across the U.S. so that they can stow away on a ship heading to the island nation of Al Amarja. See, they’ve heard rumors…