The Rare And Beautiful Bug Eyed Mouse Ferret Of Potawango Island

…they’re tiny, but creepy looking

These Dreams Go On When I Close My Eyes

A pox upon all alarm clocks, I say! Three times this week, that infernal device has awakened me from a great dream. The first time, I was dreaming about having hot jungle monkey sex with Alyssa Milano. The second dream, the next morning, found me flying Superman style over San Francisco while eating an eclair. A COCONUT ECLAIR! Finally, this morning, I was smack in the middle of a dream about winning many tens of thousands of dollars in some sort of contest. Just as Grace and I were dancing about merrily in a big pile o’ money, that cursed timepiece rudely brought me back into the land of wakefullness and poverty.

Fuck you, alarm clock! Where you a human, my hands would still be tightly gripping your throat while I laughed maniacally. Instead, I’m awake and jonesing for a coconut eclair.


Bad Tommy Crosses The Wrong Damned Dame

…not all of him was there when they found him

Yet Another “10 Things Meme”

This one is easy…

Ten Things You Want To Do Before You Die

10: Piss on the graves of several ex-presidents of the United States
9: See a family of African elephants in the wilds of Africa
8: Visit Australia and New Zealand
7: Drink Guinness in a pub in Ireland
6: Witness the collapse of worldwide civilization as we know it
5: Walk across the USA
4: Watch a really good Doc Savage movie or television series (animated would be ok)
3: Welcome friendly aliens to Earth
2: Have hot jungle monkey sex with Charlize Theron and Scarlett Johanssen
1: Celebrate my 500th birthday