The Sausage Fairies Come Out At Night

…which is good, because they’re kinda strange

 

Dog Con 7

 

Day 14, Con Day 1: In which we review the wedding & party, everybody just plays the hell out of games, then parties like it’s 1889

8:30 pm

The wedding went off perfectly, with Morris the Cat officiating. For cats, having Morris do the duty was like Jesus marrying two humans. When he walked out, every cat and dog in the placed gasped.

(Jazz: It was an incredible surprise and an honor.)

(Flash: He was great! A god among cats!)
(Leon: I got a tear in my eye when I saw him.)

(Roxy: I wept like a kitten.)

There were hundreds of sentients at the wedding and the whole town of Critter City watched on big screens all over town.

(Jazz: The Girls were beautiful in their peach colored collars, ribbons and the diamond earrings.)
(Flash: And Lulu, my Best Bitch, was snazzy in her new tuxedo paint job.)

Once the wedding was over, there were a zillion pictures and then the crazy big buffet dinner. After that were toasts and speeches. Sasha went completely sappy when she gave hers.

(Jazz: It was so sweet! She was crying and telling Flash what a great brother he was and how she loved him and was proud of him. He cried, too.)

(Flash: It was allergies.)

(Leon: Dude, you were sobbing like a baby! You used a whole box of tissue.)

Once all that was done, it was time to party! We had at least 500 sentients there. Rather than give a blow by blow, I figure I’ll just let the critters comment on stuff.

(Sasha: It was very sweet watching Flash & Jazz dance while Frank Sinatra sang to them.)

(Daisy: OMG! I got to meet Captain Kirk and Mr. Spock and Dr. McCoy and Mr. Sulu and Lt. Uhura and…)

(Silky: I loved seeing Bob Hope and Errol Flynn and John Wayne.)

(Lulu: I got to meet K-9. He’s pretty smart, but his speech software blows.)

(Daisy: …and ALL the Doctors and Captain Picard and Tony Stark and Lt. Commander Data and four James Bonds and some Klingons and…)

(Leon: You know, horses are pretty nice folks. I hung out with a few of them.)

(Roxy: The otters were a hoot. Who knew they could play jazz?)

(Sadie: Dean Martin and Johnny Carson were funny.)

(Jazz: Dad does a pretty good Louis Prima impression. Even Louis was impressed.)

(Sasha: You should have been there later on when he did his Tom Waits impression and sang “Open Invitation To The Blues”)

(Flash: Yeah, well, after Jazz sang “Why Don’t You Do Right” in the Jessica Rabbit style to me, it was honeymoon time.)

(Daisy: …and hobbits and Gandalf and HARRY GODDAMN POTTER and Hermione and Ron and Dobby and Dr. Banner and Mrs. Peel and Mr. Steed and…)

(Sadie: It was pretty cool how, after Flash & Jazz left, everything changed from the Sands Hotel in Vegas, 1962 to the Fillmore West, San Francisco, 1969)

(Roxy: Kind of mixed with a rave and a battle of the bands. It was VERY cool how those “Matrix Bracelets” let us learn how to play any instrument AND know the words to any song.)

(Daisy: …and Mal Reynolds and Clark Savage Jr. and Monk Mayfair and Bruce Wayne and Selina Kyle and Captain Jack Harkness and…)

(Sasha: It was pretty cool watching Mom, in those leather pants & jacket, sing “I Love Rock & Roll”, then see Dad & Uncle Spike do “Layla”. They were tearin’ it up!)

(Sadie: Lots of people went off to those holosuites. What was up with that?)

(Daisy: …and Groot and Rocket and Steve Rogers and Miss Romanov and Dr. Crusher and Jadzia Dax and Sarah Jane Smith and…)

Lulu: Yeah, it was a night to remember all right.)

After the party was over, we left and were back on the bus just 5 minutes after we left, but dog tired, so we all hit the sack for a good 10 hour nap. (Note: between the wedding, dinner and party, we were in folded time for 12 hours)

The Rejuvenox wore off while we were asleep, so we all woke up in our old physical forms. Better than being dead, I guess.

(Silky: Goodbye, taut tummy and firm boobs!)

Our first convention day started with a bang up breakfast at Chez Mom’s and then we all scattered to thr four winds for gaming. It broke down kind of like this…

The critters (accompanied by Arcadia) went off to play in some LARPs, with the old hands showing the newbies the ropes.

(Daisy: Wow! That Dungeons & Dogs LARP was hella fun!)

(Silky: It sure was! I got to play a fighter and I kicked ass!)

(Jazz: We cats played in the Cats & Caverns adventure. I was a mage and Roxy was a thief.)

(Roxy: We killed a Greater Mummy!)

Grace & Mary & Caroline & Ginie went into the Hall O’ Boardgames and were there most of the day.

Miranda and Lauren mostly played video games.

Spike, Brian, Avis and I did a tour of the Dealer’s room and then played in several RPG sessions, including the new D&D, Traveller and Over The Edge.

For dinner, we all went to Big Slabs O’ Meat for lots ODF, well, meat and other, lesser foodstuffs. Filled up from that, we waddled back to our rooms to get ready for the Con Party.

(Sasha: I LOVE that place! I almost overdosed on meat.)

Now, normally, this big shindig is held on Wednesday night, but this year they moved it to Thursday night because half the con was at the wedding party. Very cool of them to do it.

The theme for this year’s party is “Steampunk Villainy” so we will all be going as various Evil Geniuses, Masterminds, Mad Scientists and Vile Criminals. They have three bands playing, including Abney Park. Should be a fun Victorian time.

The critters and Lauren and Arcadia will all be here in our room watching old “Aircat” and “Bark Savage” serials. There will be a mountain of snacks.

(Leon: AIRCAT! Fuck yeah!)

More blogstuff tomorrow.

It’s All Fun And Games Until The Garden Gnomes Crave Human Flesh

…and that’s why I don’t have any of the little bastards.

 

Day 9: In which we travel westward, see strange stuff and cause a small riot in Needles, CA.

After a nice big breakfast at the Big Texan Steak Ranch, we drove over to see the Tin Can Giant, which looks much the same as I reported in the DogCon 1 report. After a few pics and a couple of hours drive, we were in New Mexico, at which point we stopped at The Invisible House. Of course, it’s not really invisible, but it is painted to perfectly blend in with the rocky landscape behind it. You have to get right up to it before you see the house. It’s one of the coolest things any of us has ever seen.

(Sasha: Meanwhile, we critters stayed on the bus and frolicked in the shoe room.)

(Bea: Where Flash got stuck in a cowboy boot for like, the 15th time.)

(Flash: Hrumph!)

The next stop was in Albuquerque, or actually about 20 miles east of it, to see the Giant Map Of America, which you have to view from about 300 feet up on a hill, because it covers 12 acres and is made entirely out of rocks, gravel & sand. It’s pretty darned accurate, too, even moreso than it was in 2008. We took some pictures, then bought all that gift shop stuff we love.

At Albuquerque, we took a left turn (I know, I know) and spent a half hour marveling at Dome City, yet another place created by hippies back in the early 1970s. It had twelve bigass geodesic domes, some of them made of glass, back in 2008, but now it’s up to 14. The now aging hippies live and farm in them, as well as running some sort of spiritual center. All very interesting and green energy educational and stuff. We all bought tie dyed t-shirts there, except Spike & Mary, who bought LOTS of tie dyed t-shirts.

We drove on to Gallup, where we ate lunch and I entered a tamale eating contest. I came in third with only 9 tamales eaten, but still won ten bucks.

(Lucy: Dad was a tamale eating machine!)

Our final roadside stop, aside from Meteor Crater in Arizona, was to see not another Giant Jesus, but a Giant Ganesha. It’s just about 100 feet off the highway, sitting on public land and…nobody knows who the hell built it! Whoever did it managed to put up a 50 foot tall statue of Ganesha on the night of June 5th, 2013 between the hours of midnight and 4:00 am. He looks great and there is a donation box, the key to which was mailed to the state of Arizona Wildlife Department. Since the statue apparently rakes in over a hundred bucks a day, the state has left it where it is and even put up a protective fence. No stuff to buy, sadly.

We arrived in Needles, California just about dark. There was a street fair going on, so we all decided to check it out. Everything was going swimmingly until Avis popped out of our world in front of about 200 people who were looking at us and the critters.

(Leon: How the hell am I gonna get home now?)

(Sasha: Don’t worry, Leon, Dad will get you home tomorrow.)

This caused a few faintings, some screams and a bunch of running around. As such things do, the panic spread fast. We all hightailed it back to the bus and popped into a world where everyone looked like Stepford People. A few minutes later, we popped back into this world just outside Las Vegas.

(Lucy: You know, I’ve always loved a good riot.)

Now, dinner has been eaten and we’re all just hanging out. Avis has been called and told that Leon will be home when she gets there. The critters all seem to be heading to the Meadow room, except Flash, who ate too much and is asleep on Grace’s lap.

(Lucy: Come on you guys, I have something to tell you.)

(Sasha: This is a good time, Lucy, but you can tell Flash when we get home.)

Final blog entry tomorrow.

Destination Sign when we started: Deep Space 9

Destination Sign when we ended: Atlantis

Radio Station of the Day: Spock & Roll Radio

Secret Monster Hunter Yumi

…more fake anime

DogCon 3: Day 1, Part 2

Ok, so let’s review my schedule and see how my day went.

11:00 am – 1:00 pm: Running Toon game “The House That Jerks Built”
This game went very well, as it has the last 52 times I’ve run it. Oldest player this time: 46 Youngest player this time: 11 Percentage of house actually constructed: 15% At what point in the game did everything explode?: just past halfway.

1:00 pm – 4:00 pm: Lunch & Dealer’s Room
Lunch was Mexican food off a taco truck. Muy bueno. I spent a surprisingly small amount in the Dealer’s Room, but had some excellent chats with folks.

4:00 pm – 5:00 pm: Seminar (panel): “Neglected Games”
This was a pretty good seminar. Many old (and some not so old) games were discussed.

5:00 pm – 6:00 pm: Seminar (watching): “Dungeons & ?”
The idea with this one was to mix fantasy/dungeon crawling, with other genres. My idea for “Dungeons & Disco” was roundly reviled.

6:00 pm – 7:30 pm: Dinner and a shower
First off, the place we ate at, “Big Slabs O’ Meat”, was spot on in the truth department. Grace had a steak that covered more square footage than out main bathroom and I had a porkchop that, had it been much bigger, would have been outside rooting around in the restaurant garden. Also, by the time out friends Sam & Paul were done with their beef ribs, it looked like an siesmosaur had died on their plates.

The critters got big bowls of chow, too and I swear, Flash (weight: 6 pounds) ate 7 pounds of fish.

8:00 pm – midnight: Playing in a game “The Lost Valley”
This game used the Basic Roleplaying system and was a pulp adventure into an African valley where dwelled the descendents of some lost Crusaders. It went very well and I doubt any of us husbands will be sleeping on the floor tonight.

Midnight – whenever: a nightcap & chatting
After getting Grace back to our room (where the critters were all still in food coma land), I went to seek out friends and have a wee dram of the good stuff. Naturally, I had 3 wee drams and we closed the joint.

I’m now back in the room and soon to bed. Tomorrow’s schedule is…

10:00 – 11:00: Seminar (panel): “Son Of Ask A GM Anything”
11:00 – 12:00: Cam Slave Booth visiting friends at GenCon
12:00 – 1:00: Lunch
1:00 – 2:30: Spa Trip
3:00 -4:00: Seminar (panel): “Old Gaming Farts Tell All”
4:00 – 6:00: Cruising Dealer’s Room & Other Con Areas
6:00 – 7:00: Pizza Dinner
7:30 – 10:30: I’ll GM my segment of the “Open To Close Dungeon” (this starts when the con starts and ends when the con ends. GM’s work 3 hours or more, players take over from other players.)
11:00 – 2:00: The Secret Event. I have no clue what the hell it’ll be.

More bloggage tomorrow.

Interesting Mice Are Often Nice

…and the like to eat rice

The Trip To DogCon 3: Day 1

Well, instead of getting up at 3:30, I overslept until 4:00, so we were only 30 minutes late getting on the road, which is a new record for almost leaving on time. Someday, we might actually leave on time, but I’m not sure I could stand the shock.

Anyway, we pulled out of the driveway at 4:00 and were soon on our way north up Interstate 5. I was the only one awake to greet the dawn 90 minutes later, but greeting the dawn is pretty fucking overrated, so I just concentrated on driving and listening to music.

Around 7, we pulled into Redding to gas up and eat large quantities of breakfast at a truck stop called Truck You, Charlie. It’s not a bad place and they do serve their food with extra grease. They also let us bring the critters in, since they are better behaved and nicer smelling than most of the regular human clientele.

About an hour later, we were off to our first stop, The Tree Tied In A Knot. This is located in the mildly famous town of Weed, California. We arrived just a few minutes ago and I’m writing this while The Girls & Flash are going walkies. More trip reportage will come later today.

Destination Sign: Oa