It’s Only A Crazy Scheme If You Fail

…uh, no

 

 

CritterCon 11

Con Day Two (By Goldie)

Hello! I’m Goldie and this is my first time at a con like this one and my first time writing something like this.

I’d like to start by thanking the Fabulous Four for helping Penny and myself get used to being in human bodies part of the time. The whole walking on two legs thing is both hard and terrifying.

(Silky: You’re welcome. Using an android body is weird and scary at first, but you and Penny got the hang of it fast.)

Since I’m a total rookie at this, Sasha suggested that I skip the meal reports and just talk about other stuff, especially gaming, so here goes.

(Sasha: Breakfast at Chez Mom’s, lunches mostly at hotdog ot taco stands, Dinner at Big Slabs O’ Meat.)

This morning, a bunch of us entered The Cursed Necropolis, a LARP for humans and critters. Uncle Doc, Auntie Grace, Auntie Mary and 5 critters entered through the north gate. My Dad & Mom, Auntie Avis and 5 of us critters entered via the west gate. Two other groups of 8 players entered through the east and south gates. The object was to grab loot, kill or avoid the undead, enter the Defiled Cathedral and perform the Ritual of Purification, then leave the city with our loot.

(Luke: That first wave of zombies scared the hell out of me.)

(Penny: A bit later, we heard Uncle Doc yell “Ghouls? I HATE fuckin’ ghouls!” from three blocks away.)

This was a holodeck style LARP and things seemed very real, visually and auditorily. The various smells they piped in seemed to affect the humans, but most of us NHT found that part very weak. The whole think was lots of fun and Our group was first in the cathedral. Sadly, Mom, Penny and Luke’s characters died buying us time to complete the ritual. Even more sadly, Uncle Doc’s team beat us out of the city by 4 minutes and had twice the loot we had. They also had only 3 characters left.

(Daisy: That was Daddy, Ollie and me. Everyone else got done in by either zombie ogres or that goddamn vampire that I finally staked.)

After the LARP, all the humans, all of us dogs, Max, Janet, and Willy all went to soak in mud. Daisy & Silky assured me that I would love it.

Well, I did love it. We all got put in tubs of warm mud where we rested for about 30 minutes. Then we all got cleaned up before getting massages. It was very relaxing and now everybody smells very nice.

(Sasha: I would have liked Dead Raccoon better that Warm Spice. Now I smell like fuckin’ banana bread or some shit.)


Uncle Doc and most of the other humans ran off to do their Old Time Radio Show. This year it was called “Tales of the Weird” and had something to do with vampires and grave robbers. I know that Dad played “Inspector Knox” and Auntie Avis played “Widow Barton”. I’m told it was a hit show. After that one, Uncle Doc, Uncle Gabriel, Auntie Mary, Luke & Misty did a half hour show called “The Adventures of Rocco & Maxie”.

(Silky: It was hilarious! Being an old gal, I had to stop and pee three times due to laughing so hard.)

It’s hard to keep track of what everyone played, but I know what games I played. I was in a D&D 5e + Steampunk game with Daisy & Max, then played in a long Savage Worlds game with Dad, Silky and Pixie. After that, I was getting pretty tired, so I went back to the suite for a nap. I woke up just in time to grab some room service chow with Luke, Misty, Silky and Snowy, then haul tail to the Friday Night Dance Party.

There were about 1,500 humans and 2,000 NHT at that party, most of us dancing up a storm. They had maybe a dozen DJs in rotation, including Silky (she was in a human body). The party went from 10:00 pm until 3:00 in the morning, but I left to crash at 2:15.

(Leon: I was there until the end. Every part of my body aches.)

(Sasha: So was I and I may need a wheelchair for the rest of the con.)

That’s pretty much all I have to report. Thanks for reading, folks!

Goldie

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